Dear Annie: Thousands of grandparents and extended family members are stepping in to raise children in today’s world, often due to parents struggling with substance abuse. While many of us take on this responsibility out of love and necessity, it comes with its own set of emotional challenges. As one of those grandparents, I’ve had to put my retirement plans on hold, which sometimes leaves me feeling angry, resentful and overwhelmed. This wasn’t the life I had envisioned for myself at this stage, and I struggle with the loss of my own plans and freedoms.

At the same time, I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to care for my granddaughter. I love her beyond words and would do anything for her, but the weight of this responsibility and the sacrifices I’ve had to make can be emotionally draining. How can I manage the frustration, grief and occasional resentment that flare up while still being the stable, loving presence my granddaughter needs? I want to embrace this role fully, but I also need to find a way to cope with my own feelings in a healthy way. — Mixed Emotions

Dear Mixed: First, let me acknowledge the incredible love and dedication you are showing by stepping up for your granddaughter. Raising a child when you expected to be entering a season of rest and freedom is no small task, and the emotions you’re feeling — love, gratitude, frustration, resentment — are all completely valid. You are not alone in this experience. Many grandparents find themselves in similar situations, balancing deep devotion to their grandchildren with the grief of a life they had planned but had to set aside. The most important thing to remember is that feeling frustrated or resentful at times does not make you a bad grandparent; it makes you a human being.

Dear Annie: Have you ever felt exhausted from constantly striving to please those who seem impossible to satisfy — pouring your heart into giving, doing and sacrificing for the people you love, only to receive fleeting moments of gratitude before they retreat into indifference, offering little more than an obligatory call now and then? Do you ever wonder why life seems to hand you the short end of the stick one time too many? What happens when the strength and resilience that have carried you through over the years no longer feel like assets but burdens — when even the need to be strong feels exhausting? Is it possible to simply be tired — not in crisis, not sinking, but stalled, as if even life itself is waiting for something more? That is how I have been feeling more and more, and I wonder if you have any advice. — Tired of Being Strong

Dear Tired: I hear you. And more importantly, I see you. Carrying the weight of others — being the dependable one, the strong one, the one who gives and gives — can be an exhausting road, especially when the appreciation is fleeting and the demands feel endless. It’s no wonder you’re tired. Strength is admirable, but when it’s expected rather than appreciated, it can start to feel like a heavy chain rather than a badge of honor. Who is caring for you? Even the strongest need rest. If life feels stalled, maybe it’s a sign to shift gears, to start asking for what you need, not just what others expect. You deserve the same care and kindness you give so freely. It’s not selfish to want balance; it’s necessary.

“How Can I Forgive My Cheating Partner?” is out now! Annie Lane’s second anthology — featuring favorite columns on marriage, infidelity, communication and reconciliation — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.